For the last few weeks, rumors about Tesla’s 2023 Holiday Update have been circulating, with friendly hackers on X (formerly Twitter) disclosing a slew of Waze-like features that were expected to be included in the current OTA software update.
Tesla’s holiday software update often contains a few unique gifts, and this year’s deployment is no exception. The business has now announced 12 improvements that should please Musk’s EV consumers.
Although real-time navigation capabilities such as “avoid construction on route” does not appear to have been enabled this time, Tesla owners will be able to make their vehicle sound like a goat when locking it. Here are all 12 updates coming to Tesla’s electric vehicles (some of which may be limited by the model you own)…
1. Personalized Lock Sounds
The update includes the ability to select a custom sound that plays when the vehicle is locked, assuming your vehicle is equipped with an external speaker (not all are).
Tired of the same old “beep, beep”? Tesla, on the other hand, provides an old-school horn, a round of applause, and the sound of a screaming goat. It’s probably amusing at first, but ultimately extremely embarrassing. But, hey, this is a car that can fart, so what do you expect?
2. New Arcade functions
Tesla’s in-car Arcade options, which are by far the best gaming experience currently available in any vehicle, have received a lot of enhancements.
According to Tesla, the update adds new vehicles and courses to Beach Buggy Racing, new modes to Polytopia and Vampire Survivors, and rumble effect to PS4, PS5, and Xbox controllers when attached via Bluetooth.
3. Backyard party
Tesla vehicles equipped with a rear screen may now play Tesla Arcade games.
A Tesla post on X, formerly Twitter, runs with the heading “LAN Party on Wheels,” implying multiplayer functionality, with front occupants ready to do battle with those in the back against the zombie apocalypse. That’s one way to ruin a trip (sorry).
4. drowning the children
Regarding rear screens, Tesla has verified that rear passengers can now utilize wireless Bluetooth headphones when viewing shows or playing games on the rear screen.
This is an absolute boon for parents, who previously had to put up with the soundtrack of whatever was pumping out of the display. Blippi, most likely.
5. iTunes Podcasts
Tesla’s infotainment system now contains the Apple Podcasts app, allowing users to easily pick up where they left off on any Apple device.
6. Route speed cameras
Tesla is introducing several ‘Waze-like’ features to its in-car navigation, including the ability to show speed cameras and red stop lights along the route, as predicted.
Surprisingly, the graphics used resemble those from Waze. However, it has not been confirmed whether this update includes mobile speed cameras or only those that have been corrected, nor has it been stated which regions will be affected.
7. Trip planning via smartphone
It’s remarkable that Tesla has taken so long to provide this capability, given that many of the ‘legacy’ carmakers have supplied the option to plan a route within a smartphone app and send it immediately to the vehicle’s infotainment screen. The Kia EV6 can do that, and Tesla owners may now as well.
8. 911 Calls Made Automatically
Again, this appears to be a North American update, as it is unknown whether this would function in other areas. However, if you are in an accident that causes the airbags to deploy, your Tesla will now automatically link you to 911 emergency services.
9.Sentry Mode now has more views
Sentry Mode, which broadcasts footage from the multiple on-board cameras to its smartphone app when the vehicle is parked, is ideal for catching the individual who pushes a shopping trolley into your parked Tesla.
Owners now have access to the left and right pillar cameras, bringing the total angle coverage to seven, thanks to this upgrade.
10.Park assist has gone high-tech.
Following the software upgrade, Tesla’s Park Assist can now produce a 3D reconstruction of the vehicle’s surroundings and present it on the infotainment display, making parking in congested areas easier.
11.Let there be light
Tesla is the only vehicle that, to our knowledge, allows you to build a custom light show, upload it to a USB drive, and then have the car flash its headlights, taillights, and indicators in a rhythmical display of technological brilliance.
This update includes a pre-programmed light show that flashes to the tune of Irving Victoria’s The Arrival. Why? Because.
12.Filters for charging location
This upgrade makes it easier to find those fast Supercharger stations. Customers can now choose between two charging speeds.
Three lightning bolts indicate places with speeds of 70kW or above, while a single lightning bolt indicates stations with speeds of 70kW or less.
Tesla is the GOAT when it comes to software updates
Say what you want about Tesla as a corporation, criticize its vehicle panel gaps, and chastise its CEO for his online rants, but it’s difficult to fault it when it comes to OTA updates. With their ability to add ever-more exciting and frequently quite helpful features, these ‘patches’ leave traditional automakers in the dust.
Again, the Holiday Update appears to be bringing a slew of new features that will make even older Teslas easier to operate. The software download includes much more, including an autonomous blind spot camera, the option to mix music in Tidal, and the addition of search in the onboard digital owner’s manual.
These may appear to be minor adjustments to some, but when compared to Volkswagen, Ford, and others, the difference is night and day. To put it in context, Tesla releases updates every month, whereas VW’s ID series is already nearly five years old, and we are on ID software 3.0.
